gntbldr
08-11-2004, 02:05 PM
> Subject: California
>
> Not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, & Texan jokes...
>
> You know you're in California when......
>
> 1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none
> are visible.
>
> 2. You make over $300,000 and still can't
> afford a house.
>
> 3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people
> carrying on a
> conversation in English.
>
> 4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple
> hair, a nose ring, and
> is named Breeze.
>
> 5. You can't remember...is pot illegal?
>
> 6. You've been to a baby shower that has two
> mothers and a sperm
> donor.
>
> 7. You have a very strong opinion about where
> your coffee beans are
> grown, and you can taste the difference between
> Sumatran and
> Ethiopian.
>
> 8. You know which restaurant serves the
> freshest arugula.
>
> 9. You can't remember...is pot illegal?
>
> 10. A really great parking space can totally
> move you to tears.
>
> 11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt
> ANY TV broadcast.
>
> 12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than
> anywhere else in the US
>
> 13. A man gets on the bus in full leather
> regalia and crotchless
> chaps. You don't even notice.
>
> 14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30am at
> Starbucks wearing the
> baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like
> George Clooney really IS
> George Clooney.
>
> 15. Your car insurance costs as much as your
> house payment.
>
> 16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber
> is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into S & M, and your Mary
> Kay rep is a guy in drag.
>
> 17. You can't remember...is pot illegal?
>
> 18. Its barely sprinkling rain and there's a
> report on every news
> station: "STORM WATCH 2004."
>
> 19. You have to leave the big company meeting
> early because Billy
> Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00pm Tae Bo
> class.
>
> 20. You pass an elementary school playground
> and the children are
> all busy with their cells or pagers.
>
> 21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you
> leave for work an
> hour early to avoid all the
> weather-related accidents.
>
> 22 . Both you AND your dog have therapists
> 23
> . ... And, the Terminator is your governor.
>
> Not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, & Texan jokes...
>
> You know you're in California when......
>
> 1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none
> are visible.
>
> 2. You make over $300,000 and still can't
> afford a house.
>
> 3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people
> carrying on a
> conversation in English.
>
> 4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple
> hair, a nose ring, and
> is named Breeze.
>
> 5. You can't remember...is pot illegal?
>
> 6. You've been to a baby shower that has two
> mothers and a sperm
> donor.
>
> 7. You have a very strong opinion about where
> your coffee beans are
> grown, and you can taste the difference between
> Sumatran and
> Ethiopian.
>
> 8. You know which restaurant serves the
> freshest arugula.
>
> 9. You can't remember...is pot illegal?
>
> 10. A really great parking space can totally
> move you to tears.
>
> 11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt
> ANY TV broadcast.
>
> 12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than
> anywhere else in the US
>
> 13. A man gets on the bus in full leather
> regalia and crotchless
> chaps. You don't even notice.
>
> 14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30am at
> Starbucks wearing the
> baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like
> George Clooney really IS
> George Clooney.
>
> 15. Your car insurance costs as much as your
> house payment.
>
> 16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber
> is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into S & M, and your Mary
> Kay rep is a guy in drag.
>
> 17. You can't remember...is pot illegal?
>
> 18. Its barely sprinkling rain and there's a
> report on every news
> station: "STORM WATCH 2004."
>
> 19. You have to leave the big company meeting
> early because Billy
> Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00pm Tae Bo
> class.
>
> 20. You pass an elementary school playground
> and the children are
> all busy with their cells or pagers.
>
> 21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you
> leave for work an
> hour early to avoid all the
> weather-related accidents.
>
> 22 . Both you AND your dog have therapists
> 23
> . ... And, the Terminator is your governor.