gntbldr
03-30-2004, 07:22 PM
A young lad has just bought his first bike and it's his pride and joy.
After riding it in the rain he noticed rust starting to form, much to his dismay. After furious cleaning and polishing he got it back to the original finish. He didn't fancy doing it all again so he asked his dad, a life long biker, for advice.
"Vaseline," came the reply "rub it on the metal parts when you think it's gonna rain and this will prevent the rust. I always carry some in my bike jacket!"
And so fuelled with this pearl of patriarchal advice he managed to preserve the finish of his beloved bike.
Time went on and he acquired a new love-a new girlfriend. Things were going well and the time came for her to invite him over for dinner to meet the family. But she warned him of an old family tradition they had, that whoever spoke first after dinner had to wash up. He thought about this as he rode over to their house, determined to make a good, strong impression by not talking after dinner.
And so after the meal finished the room went quiet as he had been warned. After a lengthy time he thought he might wind up the father by kissing his girlfriend rather passionately, but the old boy didn't even break into a sweat. So feeling determined, he picked her up, ripped off her clothing, threw her on the table and gave her a damned good seeing to, right in front of her parents! Amazingly, her dad was fuming and her mother was shocked but nobody said a word. This wouldn't do he thought, so he did the same with the mother. Amazingly the father was even more mad but STILL would say nothing!
He sat there wondering what on earth he could do next to break the silence, when he heard the sound of distant thunder. "Oh shit!" he thought "my bike will get wet!" So in a panic he fumbled around in his jacket pocket and pulled out the well used tub of vaseline.
The father saw this and yelled out "OK!OK! I'LL DO THE ****IN' DISHES!!!"
After riding it in the rain he noticed rust starting to form, much to his dismay. After furious cleaning and polishing he got it back to the original finish. He didn't fancy doing it all again so he asked his dad, a life long biker, for advice.
"Vaseline," came the reply "rub it on the metal parts when you think it's gonna rain and this will prevent the rust. I always carry some in my bike jacket!"
And so fuelled with this pearl of patriarchal advice he managed to preserve the finish of his beloved bike.
Time went on and he acquired a new love-a new girlfriend. Things were going well and the time came for her to invite him over for dinner to meet the family. But she warned him of an old family tradition they had, that whoever spoke first after dinner had to wash up. He thought about this as he rode over to their house, determined to make a good, strong impression by not talking after dinner.
And so after the meal finished the room went quiet as he had been warned. After a lengthy time he thought he might wind up the father by kissing his girlfriend rather passionately, but the old boy didn't even break into a sweat. So feeling determined, he picked her up, ripped off her clothing, threw her on the table and gave her a damned good seeing to, right in front of her parents! Amazingly, her dad was fuming and her mother was shocked but nobody said a word. This wouldn't do he thought, so he did the same with the mother. Amazingly the father was even more mad but STILL would say nothing!
He sat there wondering what on earth he could do next to break the silence, when he heard the sound of distant thunder. "Oh shit!" he thought "my bike will get wet!" So in a panic he fumbled around in his jacket pocket and pulled out the well used tub of vaseline.
The father saw this and yelled out "OK!OK! I'LL DO THE ****IN' DISHES!!!"