gntbldr
03-30-2004, 07:24 PM
It has been known for many years that sex was good exercise, but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric content of different sexual activities. Now after "original and proprietary" research they are proud to present the results.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent................................. ...12 Calories
Without her consent............................2187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands................................... 8 Calories
With one hand.................................... 12 Calories
With your teeth.................................48 5 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection................................ ......6 Calories
Without an erection............................3315 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary.............................. ...........12 Calories
69 lying down.................................... .78 Calories
69 standing up..................................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................. ........216 Calories
Doggy Style................................... ...326 Calories
Italian chandelier.............................. 2912 Calories
ORGASMS:
Real.................................... ..........112 Calories
Fake.................................... ........1315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging................................. .............18 Calories
Getting up immediately............................. .............36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately.......816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years................................... ...36 Calories
30-39 years................................... ....80 Calories
40-49 years................................... ..124 Calories
50-59 years................................... .1972 Calories
60-69 years................................... .7916 Calories
70 and over.................................... Results are still pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly.................................. .........................32 Calories
In a hurry................................... .....................98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door..............5218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door............13,521 Calories
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent................................. ...12 Calories
Without her consent............................2187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands................................... 8 Calories
With one hand.................................... 12 Calories
With your teeth.................................48 5 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection................................ ......6 Calories
Without an erection............................3315 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary.............................. ...........12 Calories
69 lying down.................................... .78 Calories
69 standing up..................................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................. ........216 Calories
Doggy Style................................... ...326 Calories
Italian chandelier.............................. 2912 Calories
ORGASMS:
Real.................................... ..........112 Calories
Fake.................................... ........1315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging................................. .............18 Calories
Getting up immediately............................. .............36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately.......816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years................................... ...36 Calories
30-39 years................................... ....80 Calories
40-49 years................................... ..124 Calories
50-59 years................................... .1972 Calories
60-69 years................................... .7916 Calories
70 and over.................................... Results are still pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly.................................. .........................32 Calories
In a hurry................................... .....................98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door..............5218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door............13,521 Calories